If I put it out in the Universe...

Will it come true?

If I know one thing about myself, it is this: I prefer simplicity in all aspects of my life. I don’t like things because I don’t know how to organize them. My brain struggles with complex projects because there are too many moving pieces. My cooking consists of grilling chicken (or salmon) and roasting veggies, and reading a book in bed is one of my top five favorite daily activities. I don’t like chaotic evenings. A single cup of pour over coffee is my favorite way to start the day. And I prefer to run the same routes, the same loops, the same everything - almost every single day. Simple and expected. And most of the time, I am at peace. 

There is, however, one area I struggle to find peace with and that is my purpose. In December, I completed a reflection activity from Holstee and my takeaways were this: my life is too focused on running, I lack adventure, and I’m not putting myself out there. I’m not taking chances, failing, succeeding, learning, and growing. There is this great comfortable spot in life where I reside, and I happily stay there. As I sat there completing this reflection exercise, my main thought was, Wow, my life is lame. Or more like, I am lame. How can I grow sitting in the comfort zone? How can any of us grow that way? And isn’t that the point of life - to become the thing we were always meant to be? 

When I think about my ideal life and what that would look like, several things come to mind. First, I would still run - that will stick around until my body says I can no longer do it. But my running would be more about helping others than lowering my own times. It’s been fun training for fast times over the years, but if I never hit another PR in my life, I’ll be okay with that (I think). I want to meet more people, try out a new distance, a new route, or hop into a local run club. I would also write. For so long, I’ve wanted to write a book about running. Perhaps my stories aren’t that interesting to many, and that’s okay. Personally, I love my story from broken hip and surgery to sub 3 hour marathon. It’s a testament to believing in yourself even when so many say you shouldn’t, and I think that’s something we can all relate to. Stories are meant to be shared, and I want to share mine. In my ideal life, I’d also speak to students. One of my favorite things about teaching was standing up in front of a group of young high schoolers and helping them to believe in themselves. Yes, I taught Spanish, but I also liked to say I taught life. Young minds are curious about so many things and too many times they are missing an adult to help guide them along the way. 

So there. It’s out in the Universe. For my intention journal prompt this morning, I had to answer the question: if you could choose one word to guide you through this year, what would it be and why? I decided on the word service because I know I feel most fulfilled when I’m helping others. I believe service can be through sharing my own experiences and/or helping others to believe in themselves just a little more. Here is to a year of trying, failing, succeeding, growing, and helping others along the way…